This is why I started this blog

Thanks to all of you who expressed concern for my near-death experience. It's so nice to know that all of you out there that I've never met care what happen to me! :)

Anyway, I thought I'd recount a happier experience that defines why I started this blog. In other words, "Things that only happen to me."

I went to a bar last weekend, Lebo's... a not-so-hole-in-the-wall bar that's either in Ohio or Kentucky. I actually don't know, because going there you cross over the OHKY border about five times.

Anyway, I'm watching all the karaoke madness when Slash from Guns-N-Roses gets up and does a song. A Guns-N-Roses song, natch. Only in Kentucky. Hello, who else does that happen to?

While checking out the assorted crazies in the bar, I notice a man that is particularly attractive, except for the giant nipples protruding from his overly tight t-shirt. Regardless of his freakishly large nipples, he's still a good looking fellow, in that dorky way that I'm a fan of.

He ends up sitting at the table next to Rebecca and I and starts talking to us. When he asks if we're singing, Rebecca informs him that I, in fact, am up in a few minutes. He asks what I'm singing. I tell him "Son of a Preacher Man" by Dusty Springfield.

"You can sing that song?" he asks?

"I can sing the shit out of that song," I reply. Partially because it's true. And partially because I'm pissed off that he would question it. I mean, it's karaoke for God's sake, not American Idol (which, okay, is a glorified karaoke competition, but gimme a break, I'm trying to tell a story here!)

So I get up and sing. I sang the shit out of that song.

When I get back to my spot, the guy compliments my singing. Then he starts asking what I do, do I ever write songs, what kind of music am I into... assorted questions that don't have much to do with karaoke.

Then he offers me a spot in a band that he is putting together. Apparently, he is a local producer and is looking for a girl vocalist to join this group he's producing for. Swear to God, I'm thinking I just got discovered. He gives me his information and suggests I try out for the rest of the band.

Turns out, this band is a hard-rock, alterna, angry punk rock country band. In other words, they have no actual musical style to speak of.

I didn't call him.